The bacon tree

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The bacon tree

Back in cowboy times, a westbound wagon train was lost and low on food. No other humans had been seen for days, and then the pioneers saw an old Norwegian man sitting beneath a tree. Their leader stepped down from his wagon and said" "Hello stranger,is there some place ahead where we can get food?"

"Vell, I tink so," the old man said, "but I wouldn't go up dat hill und down de udder side. Somevun tole me you'd run into a big bacon tree."

"A bacon tree?" asked the wagon train leader.

"Yah, a bacon tree. Vould I lie? Trust me. I vouldn't go dere."

The leader goes back and tells his people what the Norwegian said. "So why did he say not to go there?," a person asked. Other pioneers said, "Oh, you know those Norwegian people - they lie just for a joke." So the wagon train goes up the hill and down the other side. Suddenly, Indians attack them from everywhere and massacre all except the leader who manages to escape and get back to the old Norwegian.

Near dead, the leader staggers up to the old man and shouts, "You fool! You sent us to our deaths! We followed your route, but there was no bacon tree, just hundreds of Indians who killed everyone but me." The old Norwegian man holds up his hand and says, "Vait a minute. "He quickly picks up an English-Norwegian dictionary and begins thumbing through it.

"Oof-da, he says, I made such ah big mishtake! It vuzn't a bacon tree,

(Are you ready?)

(Scroll down)

(You're going to hate me.)

"It vuz a ham bush."
By netchicken: posted on 10-4-2006

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